#497) What I Want (for a Change)

I was reflecting back on all my boyfriends over the years last night. There have been quite a few. I was lying next to my sleeping boyfriend, but these thoughts riled me up, kept slumber from reaching out to me. To generalize, I think that I, like many women, and almost all subs, have been too agreeable over the years. We go with the flow, acquiesce to what our Top wants. This was particularly true for me because I tended to get involved with older, established, wealthy men, men used to getting what they wanted, in the boardroom and the bedroom. I contrasted this unfulfilling past situation with my current boyfriend. I hope my years of serial monogamy end with him, that this one is long-lasting, maybe even forever. So, as I reviewed the short-comings of my past, I formed a sort of manifesto in my mind. I made a list in my mind of what I want, which is a change from what I’ve put up with in the past. You might find things listed here pleasure-oriented and profound. You might find these things perverse and profane. I don’t really give a fuck. This is about me (for a change); this IS me.
The first thing I realized is that my lover doesn’t have to be a man. I’m done with fearing labels. I am no longer bi-curious. I am bisexual, maybe pansexual. I am going to continue tasting all the different flavors available, not limit my palate to what I know, what I’ve liked before. They make such a wide variety of vibrators and strap-ons; I do not need a real cock, particularly if the latter would preclude me getting a really good fuck that the former promise every time, all night long. It seems to me that the person who can lick a pussy best might be the person who owns one. I know for a fact that some of the most exacting and strict Doms are women, women who are free of worries about being labeled harsh, cruel or macho, women who would see past my crocodile tears (and all my other tricks) and who would make me cry for real, cry for mercy.
I want a lover who wants to spank me as much as I want to be spanked. That is to say, all the fucking time, exhaustively and exhaustingly, indefatigably and determinedly. I’m insatiable when it comes to spanking and fucking; can you sate my voracious appetites? Only affirmative-answerers need apply to fill the position of lover, the position of filler-of-me.
I want a lover who wants to fuck me up the butt just as much as in my pussy. There, I said it. I love it up my ass just as much as I do regular sex. They are not interchangeable, the experience for each of us, fucker and fuckee, is quite different in each locale. You can’t fuck me the same way in both places. You certainly can’t go back and forth between the two holes over and over. So, just as I don’t douche because I want a vagina that smells and tastes like a healthy and fragrant vagina, I AM anal about keeping that rear orifice immaculate! My holes (all three of them) are not the same, each one is unique, but I love to be tongued and penetrated in each, and have trained myself to be able to give my lover pure pleasure in each. But, if you are squeamish about eating my ass for hours, we’re not a match. The same goes for raw-dogging me, or hot-dogging me, or anything else sexual to do with my ass and anus, the focus and epicenter of my libido.
There is more that I want, things that I want to say, but that’s enough for now, that’s a start. I wouldn’t want anyone to think I’m some demanding diva. I’m just a sub, sick of compromising.

4 responses to “#497) What I Want (for a Change)”

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