I think of myself as wonderfully open in this forum, in a way I wish I could be transparent about my kink in real life. I think that I’m writing a D/s version of the Aretha Franklin song, “I Say a Little Prayer.”
My lover thinks that I overshare, that I top from the bottom habitually, that I’m a cock-tease here.
I’m going to be punished later today. If I’m going to get it, I might as well make certain that it’s worth all of the time and effort. So here is my private diary published publicly.
I gave myself a thorough enema this morning, knowing that I soon won’t be able to sit on the toilet or anywhere else. Enemas turn me on, this one in particular really got my juices flowing. (I could give graphic details here, Robert, but am being somewhat circumspect. See! I do have some modesty! *)
I took a hot shower, soaping myself up extra well. As I did so, I appreciated how smooth the flesh of my well-upholstered bottom is, unblemished, cool to the touch, fair complected. All of this will change with the anticipated punishment. (*)
I lubricated my rectal passage thoroughly with Astroglide. I have the feeble hope that my lover will be distracted from punishing my bottom and want to make love with me in this alternate venue. (*)
On put on a T-backed thong pair of underwear. I do not usually wear these, but want to cover my vagina and anus from the view of the cameras (still and moving) that I want to document this punishment. Normally, I don’t like the feel of a thin piece of fabric up my ass crack, but this time I found it stimulating. (*)
I rubbed a copious amount of skin lotion into my butt cheeks, again appreciating the satin-like slipperiness of my skin. While I was at it, I did the same to my titties, pinching and twisting my aching nipples, keeping me right on the brink of sexual release, so close that I can look over the edge at the dizzying height, but just an inch back from toppling over the precipice. (*)
I laid out on the floor every implement we own. Having combined our respective collections of implements of ass destruction, it is quite an impressive array. Robert has my permission to use any or all of these many tools to work my ass for me. Some of these implements fill me with longing, some with dread. (*I wanted to masturbate at each of these stages, but resisted. More evidence of my willpower, sir.)
As much as I’d love to, I don’t sit. Even though I know that I soon won’t be able to do so, I want my bottom to be without sit-spots when he comes home to me. I have long thought of my bottom as belonging to him, this is just another example of my submissive mindset. (I really am a good girl, Robert, even though I misbehave far too often. I am your devoted submissive, lover. [Is it clear that I’m scared sh*tless of the punishment ahead? It ought to be just by my use of that “s” word!]) Instead, to occupy my time, I first set up the cameras tripods, then get on elbows and knees on the bed, with my ass elevated high, and browse the Internet on your laptop. I look for sexy photos of women who aren’t using chairs to sit upon in the conventional way.
Do you like this pose, ass in the air and accessible?
I know that you like this one!
I, on the other hand, rather fancy this pose, with both buttocks and nearby orifices proffered.
I’m sure that we agree upon this pose, being both coy and seductive simultaneously.
I thought this might appeal to you, Robert, my love. I promise to try to hold still for my lesson, but if you think I need to be restrained, this looks intriguing…
I’ll be waiting for you on all fours on our bed, my love. I’d love to run to you as you come through the door, cover you with kisses, seduce you. But my punishment should take precedence, so I’ll remain as I am, ass at the ready. Know that I love you!